** There's a dog in the neighborhood that barks at EVERYTHING.

** The tiny red string on the Band-Aid wrapper never works for you.

** You rub on hand cream and can't turn the bathroom doorknob to get out.

** There are always one or two ice cubes that won't pop out of the tray .

** You wash a garment with a tissue in the pocket and your entire laundry comes out covered with lint.

** You slice your tongue licking an envelope.

** You can never put anything back in a box the way it came.

** The person behind you in the supermarket runs his cart into the back of your ankle.

** You have to try on a pair of sunglasses with that stupid little plastic tag in the middle of them.

** You have to inform five different sales people in the same store that you're just browsing.

** Your tire gauge lets out half the air while you're trying to get a reading.

** The car behind you blasts its horn because you let a pedestrian finish crossing.

** There's always a car riding your tail when you're slowing down to find an address.

** You open a can of soup and the lid falls in.

** You drink from a soda can into which someone has extinguished a cigarette.

** The elevator stops on every floor and nobody gets on or off.

** Three hours and three meetings after lunch you look in the mirror and discover a piece of parsley stuck to your front tooth.

** A piece of foil candy wrapper makes electrical contact with your filling.

** A station comes in brilliantly when you're standing near the radio but buzzes, drifts and spits every time you move away.

** Your glasses slide off your ears when you perspire.

** You can't look up the correct spelling of a word in the dictionary because you don't know how to spell it.